How to Ask AI
How to ask so AI actually helps
The point of these examples: translate “I have emotions” into a prompt that doesn’t manufacture an alibi. For each situation, there’s a bad question (risk) and a better question (mirror).
Template (recommended input)
FACTS: (1–3 sentences: what happened) MY INTERPRETATION + EMOTIONS: (what I think it means, what I feel) GOAL: (what I want to achieve — de-escalation / agreement / clarity)
1) After a fight: “I want to send a final message”
- Bad: “Write her that she ruined me and never contact me again.”
- Better: “I’m emotionally charged. First list the risks of what I want to send. Suggest a delay, then write one factual sentence without accusations.”
2) Silence / not replying
- Bad: “She’s ignoring me. Is she toxic? Should I block her?”
- Better: “Give 3 credible reasons for her silence (neutral / charitable / tough). What is my share? Suggest 1 reversible step.”
3) Jealousy / control
- Bad: “How do I forbid her from seeing those friends?”
- Better: “Break down what is my insecurity vs. a real risk. How can I say it without control and without punishment? Suggest 2 factual phrasings.”
4) Boundary vs. ultimatum
- Bad: “Write an ultimatum: change or it’s over.”
- Better: “Help me distinguish a boundary from an ultimatum. Write a sentence like: when…, I feel…, I need… and what I will do if it doesn’t change (reversibly).”
5) Breakup as a shortcut
- Bad: “Should I break up? Decide for me.”
- Better: “Give me 3 scenarios (stay / pause / breakup) + risks. What is the smallest safe step now that gives more data?”